Penguins.

Penguins have gotten so good at winning lotteries that they are no longer allowed to purchase tickets due to bill 4327A being passed last week. Rep. John Green and his community members had become so fed up with the penguins winning the lottery in their area that they decided it was time to crack down. Somehow they had figured out a strategy that allowed them to pick the correct ticket not just often, but every – single – time, for the last five months. Every lottery pull in the last 5 months had been won by a penguin. The stats behind that are just impossible, it should not be able to be done. John Green decided enough was enough, and a law was passed that made it illegal for any penguin to enter into an establishment selling lottery tickets, and also revoked all penguins’ ID’s and licenses, making it impossible for them to purchase a lottery tickets or collect any prize money. John was excited to get back to purchasing lottery tickets with the same hopeful attitude participants had shared before the penguin crisis.